These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and
were printed in the July 21, 1997 issue of Fortune Magazine:
=========================================
01.  I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.
02.  I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreadsheet progroms.
03.  Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.
04.  Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.
05.  Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions.
06.  Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.
07.  It's best for employers that I not work with people.
08.  Let's meet, so you can 'ooh' and 'aah' over my experience.
09.  You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.
10.  Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.
11.  I was working for my mom until she decided to move.
12.  Marital status: single.  Unmarried.  Unengaged. Uninvolved. No
commitments.
13.  I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.
14.  I am loyal to my employer at all costs . . . Please feel free to
respond to my resume on my office voice mail.
15.  I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and
absolutely nothing.
16.  My goal is to be a meteorologist.  But since I possess no training
in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage.
17.  I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant.
18.  As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments.
19.  Personal interests: donating blood.  Fourteen gallons so far.
20.  Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store.
21.  Note: Please don't miscontrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have
never quit a job.
22.  Marital status: often.  Children: various.
23.  Reason for leaving last job:  They insisted that all employees get
to work by 8:45 a.m. every morning.  Could not work under those
conditions.
24.  The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous
employers.
25.  Finished eighth in my class of ten.
26.  References: None.  I've left a path of destruction behind me.